meredith murphy | luminous being

discovering the universe with raspberries

by meredith murphy

Savoring a small handful of fresh organic raspberries.  

"What a distinct flavor," I noticed.  "How amazing."  

Then suddenly still as the realization, the knowing emerges..."these are just energy configured.  My tongue, is also energy configured in form--designed to work with my body so that when I eat a raspberry I experience this flavor..."

Aha! 

This one small experience, revealing, indicating, the nature of experience here, the illusion of this game.  The whole thing temporary!  Just energy in ever changing shapes and forms, creating and expressing experience. 

Endless streams of specificity, not real or not eternal, just part of the game. Just energy given momentary expression in a vast, timeless eternal unchanging sea of being, that I AM.

So simple.  Life is transparent if we just pay attention.

 

mirror, mirror

More and more it is so obvious...

This is the real conversation to have with ourselves in the mirror!

What would it mean to realize we are each, our own, dream come true? To look nowhere but in the mirror for all that we wish to know, for the love we wish to feel...to gaze deep within to the opening to everything that resides inside.

Ah...! Abundant love and happiness. Yes!

cosmic clues to happiness

by meredith murphy

This morning as I started my day to a mocking bird orchestra-in-one, and then a flock of naturalized parrots took flight, soaring overhead and squawking with such exuberance that all the dogs including our new puppy Lily stopped, turned and looked up, I began to ponder my song.

As a non-native speaker of these early morning songs, I can only marvel at their lyrical beauty.  Birds to me and to many of us have long symbolized freedom.  Their innate rapport with the sky alone is enough to create a sense of awe.  Their consistent singing, though is what really moves me.  It feels to me like the same commitment to being that trees and flowers demonstrate; a devotion to embodying the essence of each aspect regardless of location, weather, or any other mitigating circumstance.

Birds, I've noticed, sing even in the rain.  They sing when the local city workers are drilling and putting in new traffic lights, like this morning. They sing when it's cold and when it's scaldingly hot and hasn't rained in months.  They just sing.

I love to sing and although I typically don't start my day that way, I actually used to.  I typically start my day in quiet, listening, which I also love.  But I have not been singing much these last few years after giving my piano away when it lost it's tune and although I intended to buy a new one, I haven't and slowly as it often happens, music a great passion of my early days, just faded out of my daily experience.  

I remember being in college and going to choir after lunch while a student a Michigan State.  The incredible joy of making such beautiful sounds, breathing deeply and doing so with others, was pretty heavenly. 

Considering all the themes in life lately that have been urging us to tune into our heart's desires, I am wondering if perhaps it's time to take a hint from the birds and begin to do so--meaning to sing more, consciously and with the kind of simple enthusiasm for dawn, another day, for being alive and aware, to articulate my own affinity with the sky by wafting my own sounds on the breeze and letting my heart flow into song.  

I think there's a connection between music, the spheres, birds and harmony which is potentially the root of happiness: a no holds barred expressing of one's essence in the dance of life.

Singing is often associated with the breath, and there are all kinds of feelings about if one sings well, or not and who is a singer.  But in truth the birds songs I loved so much this morning were more about the innate ability we each have to just let our heart-felt participation in this amazing expansion loose!

These songs were just sung.  No rehersal.  These beautiful birds are being, not performing.  It was sharing, communicating, expressing perhaps, but there was no evaluation or judgment, just letting it rip with no thoughts--second or otherwise.

I can see where in the midst of this is some sort of cosmic clue: a recipe for happiness.  Something about love for everything and just being part of the game.  The birds don't have some idea of who they are or how they should sing that interferes or narrates the experience.  They just do it.  They do it their own way.  It's their thing.

When I sing with this kind of release, I feel great.  I am entirely extravagantly relaxed (all that breath pouring in and out) and happy.  It all becomes effortless and like the bird, I am free.  In a moment like this we just flow with sound and breath in a Oneness that's ancient and emblamatic of the nature of our being and all being.  Sound is, after all, vibration.  Vibration is the essence of life and light.  While singing we potentially release our identity as one being and become One with that moment of focus, with the harmony of other singers, the instrument, the dogs barking, the sound of the lawn mower, the tune on the radio, or even, sometimes a counterpoint to the silence.  

Our life is song as there is vibration created by our energy, from our intentions which take vibrational structure and although we don't often hear them, we emanate their themes.  We are continually, in essence, singing!

Singing has always given me joy and as I awaken I feel the longing for more of it again.  I sing to my dogs when I feed them.  I sing in my car.  And I can feel that this desire to sing is expanding.  It is I suspect a conscious, reliable pathway to the essence of my being, which is innately happy.  It's a way to dip into my connection with everything, to flow the energy of breath from my heart into sound and to allow my melody to take the essence of me to the sky.   The resurfacing of my desire to sing, however, is more than that--it's a sign that my whole being is longing for release beyond story and purpose into just expressing the essence I am.  

It's a reflection of the changes within and the transformation that is flowing within all of us.  It's becoming self-evident that my song is vital and important as is yours.  And that each of us choosing to be our own undistorted melody is the essence of the new song...the song of harmony, peace, love and happiness on the inner planes, mirrored in the manifest reality. 

I may not be able to fly, but as I realize that I am consistently singing, I can own my ability to tune the air to my song.  I consciously realize that I am continually broadcasting, and everything that is, hear's everything I transmit.

With this in mind, I choose to be the essence of me: an enthusiastic sharer.  A joy-filled being who loves to translate into words, paintings, stories, experiences, or sounds, what I've felt, discovered, know and love.  That's me. That's my song.  And there is no end...there's more where that came from, I am infinite and limitlessly expanding with everything that is.

Each day that I let myself just be myself, without judgment or concern, I sing my true song.  There is the ultimate alignment of being as essence.  There is ease.  Life opens up as I do.  I become one with the morning with creation and claim my own connection to the sky.  And instead of pondering my song, I simply close the gap by being me: I AM my song.  

no immersion into the stream of consciousness

by meredith murphy

There are so many good things to wake up to. I just ate the most amazingly sweet pear. An entirely good reason to get out of bed in and of itself! What's next life...?! Loving all of it.

Feeling very peaceful and rested at last after many high-vibe-buzzing days with less sleep and the body-temple hunkered down to integrate all the energy that has been flowing onto our beautiful planet.

I succeeded in getting rid of LOTS of stuff over the past week.  Another layer of life-simplification in honor of our upcoming entry into the lunar new year.  It is amazing how emotional and draining it was to let go of things.  I noticed I could go through things effortlessly for a while, but then I would reach a limit--I needed a break.  If I pushed through and continued "throwing stuff into the good-will bag" I got irritated and sad about even things I haven't used.  ?  What's up with that life?  I sincerely crave deeper simplicity and I would like a little cooperation!

Then I realized that somehow there was a feeling of decisiveness about my life contained in all of these small actions; each an act of consolidation.  Many steps toward converging in the now and not keeping tendrils of energy anywhere else--like embedded in things with memories that reflect prior pathways.  As if somehow letting go of these things, was a gradual act of putting all of my energy in this version of self and acknowledging more consciously the life I have chosen and created.  

Of course the up-side of all of this is a much clearer, cleaner house, and more energy.  Empowerment even, for consciously drawing all of our energy into the present moment gives us great power.

So I persevered throughout the week, gradually accumulating bag and box after bag and box, until the hallway was full of them and I began to forget what was even in them and the feeling of lightness begin to come over me.

Last night going to bed I surveyed my newly sparse landscape and was surprised.  I realized that somehow all those things felt a little like insulation.  I had this feeling that I might get cold, literally!  That I might somehow be less interesting and life might be less fun without all these expressions of the many versions of Meredith's-life that these clothes and books and shoes and old papers and electronic devices represented.  "Well," I thought to myself putting another blanket on the bed and crawling in with my socks on..."we'll see."

It couldn't be more confirming that when I did this I woke up this morning I felt deeply rested and peaceful.  Lying in bed reflecting on my dreams for some reason I thought, "I wonder how much more I could let go of..." and I exhaled and let my body go soft.  I was surprised that even upon awakening there was the potential to relax more!  So I did this several times, until I could seemingly relax no more.  Amazing that even emerging from sleep there were layers of energy in some kind of holding pattern.  Relaxed now I felt immersed in the living stream of consciousness.  I felt waves of Shakti energy rise up my spine. Smiling I turned to pet my purring cat lying next to me, and just let it flow.

A bit later sitting down with my gorgeous juicy pear, some Ezekiel toast with raw almond butter and a cup of coffee, I savored all of this.

The Universe, reflective as it is, deepened things.  Writing this post, I googled "photos of a red d'Anjou pear" because none of the ones I took did justice to this glorious piece of fruit I had just eaten.  Out of all the photos that came up I immediately resonated to this one--loving both the composition/lighting and the fact that it looks pretty much exactly like the pear I had.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/lesyeuxheureux/5495084615/

Laugh of all laughs--the copyrighted photo (thus my lame homage above) is by my ex-husband, Christopher Casilli.

As a reminder that we own nothing, that we simply let experiences flow through us, that nothing ever ends, and nothing is ever really separate, I got a big wink from the Universe.  I couldn't believe it.  

We've not spoken in years, divorcing in 1999 and yet here he is again and here I am resonating to him--feeling drawn to that image immediately and above all others.  Out of the blue!  I didn't even know he was taking photos.  Reminding me that "things" and form, have nothing to do with connection.   All paths and energy being infinitely open and available, drawn forth by focus.  

Everything I experience or have experienced, arises from the ground of reality, the Infinite Oneness.  There is no way to immerse myself in this or separate myself from it.  These are illusions of duality.  I can buy into illusions that connections are created by physical presence, things, or memories, but in truth connection simply IS.  And everyone and everything is a reflection of this One Self, the Infinite Beautiful Oneness, I AM/We Are.  There is no immersion in the stream of consciousness, I AM the stream of consciousness.

Blessings and love to you Christopher--thank you for this humorous pulse of truth and what a gorgeous photo!  Namaste to all versions of me reading this.  I love you.  

An experiential definition of Oneness is fully available.  Freely given.  Moment to moment.  Happiness of being arises from this awareness.  There are many doorways to this realization; life opens to us at ever moment.  Even a piece of fruit can wake you up!

 

the confidence of innocence

by meredith murphy

Today I saw this quote/image* posted by a friend online and it was so in harmony with this opening into the Eclipse Passageway and what I had written this morning that I wanted to share it with you.

Today, I evoke the faith of a caterpillar who takes its step toward transformation knowing not what the process is or what the struggles will be, but remembering somewhere inside that it is a butterfly and knowing that is ready to fly. I know that the miracle is already there. I am the miracle.
~ Marianne Williamson

The thing which most resonates with me about this is the image, and the innocence and fragility of this beautiful striped caterpillar.  Yesterday during the Opening Event of the Eclipse Passageway we experienced a layered guided journey which transported us to a sacred grove and opened up a doorway to the innocence and dreams we had earlier in life, calling forth our ability to remember and the courage to revisit what Archangel Michael called, "our saved up wishes," so we might bring ourselves into greater wholeness.

The striking thing about this to me is this return over the last year of my life, of a profound and deep desire to allow my own innocence to arise.

Like many of us, I am sensitive and appreciative of innocence in others--children, flowers, my beloved animal companions...and yet how often do we consider that innocence might actually be such a vital aspect of our very self NOW?  As an adult?  As an awakening being of light, I am beginning to realize that innocence has a resonance that is similar to purity and optimism--it's implied by the true nature of our being.  Ironically, however, innocence has in our world become a tainted notion.  It is associated with naivety, which often even is used as a judgment to criticize someone as stupid, out of touch with reality, not practical, not capable.

This is a vast distortion of the true meaning and quality of innocence.

The literal meaning of innocence, means without guilt.  We associate "growing up" with a loss of this innocence. This too is a distorted perspective.

To grow, rather then to "grow up" is the natural mode of being.  To continually expand and express, to evolve and differentiate while also moving increasingly toward wholeness and oneness.  Seemingly contradictory, but actually and entirely the true nature of reality.

Innocence is your actual state of being--pure, perfect, without any guilt or sin.  There is truly no such thing as right or wrong, just choices, just different experiences, all taking place within the wholeness of being and ways of exploring and expressing to discover what brings joy, to extend that which you are in new ways and forms.

So during this eclipse cycle, I invite you to realize that you are pure, perfect, lacking nothing, capable of creating miracles as an extension of that which you are--miraculous and radiant.  You occur as a result of Divine Presence conjuring up this idea which became you!  Your very being is the result of divine creation--you ARE a miracle.

Once you realize this...you begin to slowly feel this truth in your being.  You begin to consider that perhaps it is true--that you are made up of divine energy and all of you is wonderful and beautiful.  You begin to get gentle with how you look at your life and to contemplate that perhaps, yes, all that you have done and been is just ways of exploring, expressing, discovering, extending, that which you are.  You soften up toward you. 

And as one grows into this realization, the knowing of your eternal nature nature arises.  You recognize this life experience as a version of you extended into this human form for even more exploring and choice-making, discovering and being.   All to grow and have fun.  To discover new pathways to joy. 

And the curiosity grows...the sense of wonder and amazement you had while young resurfaces expanded, and life becomes a daily opening into the possibilities of all that you might be and become, discover and create, feel, sense and realize.

You realize that all of your experience arises within you and then flows out into form and experience.  That certain forms and experiences stimulate your heart and your feelings of love and the devotion to these choices grows.  You begin to understand how to cultivate happiness and exhilaration.  You love peace and contentment and know how to rest in these.  The confidence of innocence returns.

As we orient more knowledgeably to our life experience here, we become more skillful and this skillfulness manifests visibly as grace, ease, humor, playfulness, lightness, simplicity, abundance, confidence, clarity, self-love, gentleness, generosity, appreciation, trust, optimism and innocence.

A deep sense of connection arises and one dwells nestled in love and companionship.  The presence of divine love is felt pervasively and deep peace settles in.

Disturbances to this state of infinite presence are simply that: disturbances. Not permanent.  Just interruptions.  Detours.  Decide to see them as such and they resolve even faster and with grace!  Like lightening in the sky, these states of our true nature being distrubed always dissolve, settle, revealing the clarity of expansive spaciousness.  Our true nature is this infinite ground within which all forms of focus and experience arise from and dissolve into.  Nothing good or bad.  All made of the same stuff--every experience, each moment, all forms.  You are eternal, undifferentiated spaciousness.  At the very core of being you are space!  Pure potential.  Everything and nothing.  Miraculous how this space extends into endless variations of expression!

Although glimpsing and tapping into this dynamic experience initially can be disorienting and destabilizing to your way of being, this is a positive sign!  It is the experience of discovering you have been used to living with boundaries to define you.  The fact that your life can be destabalized reveals to you that you have identified with these boundaries as though they were you--you're building your understanding on a part of the illusions which is temporary and will, like that lightening in the sky--dissolve and disappear.  That you've actually maybe been using your limits to create your sense of who you are.  Once this larger persepctive emerges, you begin for periods of time to let go of this limiting idea and learn to be in expansiveness without anxiety.  Doing this, you gradually grow into an enlarged template of being and your life experience is transformed.

How do we make this change? 

We cannot grasp this with our mind, the same way the caterpillar cannot create it's own transformation by following some instruction guide.  We're not given the full picture all at once, it's too large!  It unfolds gradually and we feel our way into this. We allow ourselves to be guided from within by curiosity and in trust and with innocence.  We exist and live in a state of simultaneous anticipation and abundant delight.   The truth of our being is reflected in the microcosm...in the caterpillar, and in all cycles and metamorphosis which we see.  The creation of the butterfly, the pearl from the friction of water and sand, of fruit from flowers, of rain clouds from condensation.

Like the pearl, we too first experience a sense of "damage" to our outer edges, which initiates this process of change.  The mystery is that this revelation that our identity is an illusion, initiates the expansion into knowing our true nature.

The miracle of life is that all of life is a miracle. Know this and know ecstasy and exultation of spirit.  The miracle of life now is not only within you; it's everywhere!

 

 

*posted by Blue Moon Shamanic Reiki

i sing the body electric

Inspired by American poet, Walt Whitman, from his iconic book "Leaves of Grass," I celebrate you today as I offer you this song based on that poem, with my gratitude and my love--for all that you are, for all that we are creating. I Sing The Body Electric- Fame For many years of my life I had no conscious memory of this vast purpose we now so glorious share...and yet even before then, this song made my soul sing.    So you see, all that we are and all that we need to know, comes to us with ease and glory, effortlessly...and we recognize and resonate to the truth, even when we do not yet fully understand the enormity of it's meaning...as Archangel Michael would say {smile}...   I Sing The Body Electric - Fame Songwriters: Michael Gore, Dean Pitchford   I sing the body electric I celebrate the me yet to come I toast to my own reunion When I become one with the sun And I'll look back on Venus I'll look back on Mars And I'll burn with the fire of ten million stars And in time And in time We will all be stars   I sing the body electric I glory in the glow of rebirth Creating my own tomorrow When I shall embody the earth   And I'll serenade Venus I'll serenade Mars And I'll burn with the fire of ten million stars And in time And in time We will all be stars   We are the emperors now And we are the czars And in time And in time We will all be stars   Together we are making beautiful music.  The symphony of the stars.  No less.  I celebrate your sovereign glory! And so it is.  I give you my thanks.  Happy thanks-giving, to all sources of joy in your life, may they feel your songs of praise. Love, Meredith

your spiritual life and all the rest of life...?

by meredith murphy

There isn't a spiritual life and a "real" life, or a worldly life. There is just life and the cosmic, quantum, spiritual nature of it all is present in everything all the time.

We're all here being human, emanating the spiritual essence we are...

So it's our choice. We can open to the reality that it's all spiritual and tap into the love and beauty of every moment. Or we can confine our awareness of spirituality to 10-15 minutes of meditation, or certain times and places, in which case life is very hard, and happiness and love are elusive, because you can't find them without opening to what's inside, what's in your heart--which is the spiritual path and practice of being alive and conscious.

 

time jumping and future views of now

by meredith murphy

Love is deeply available everywhere.  The momentum of peace is accelerating. Can you feel it?

The capacity of knowing the loving sentience of All-That-Is, is increasingly felt.  Once one connects and knows this profound sea of limitless appreciation, one then increasingly expresses this through presence as love.

Many of us bring forth contributions to the evolution of collective perspectives.  My lineage through Naeshira and the Pleiades is one of many experiences of creating peace momentum in civilization and culture. Others of you too carry this mantle. 

Our wise and ancient lineage wisdom flows through us into this NOW moment of divine unfolding and the capacity for multidimensional in-form is expanding daily as we receive new solar codes.

The 5th World Prophecy is Fulfilled

This message from infinite time unfolds from the future and looks at what we're creating. I found it wonderful to revisit this today and so offer it to you.

May it ignite your hope, your realization, your memory and your joyous participation.

Beyond time, in spherical infinite nowness, love abundantly IS.  Aho!

 

resting is not doing nothing

by meredith murphy

This morning I was very inspired by an observation Nancy Ward made in her monthly Soul Transitions Vibe Report for September.  I didn't even read the whole message, because once I read the first few paragraphs, I knew that the message for me was held therein.  Nancy writes:

I’ve noticed in myself – and heard reports from other people – that there’s a feeling of ennui that many are experiencing. Feeling unmotivated, as if we’re swirling around in an eddy of energy, not going anywhere, just spinning in the same spot. To move out of this, I am receiving messages to do what is fun, what makes me feel good.

Yes!  I thought.  I feel it.  That's what I'm noodling over and prodding within myself--attempting to get a firm glimpse of this morning.

I was grateful for this mirror of my experience which tuned me in further to my own current.  I reminded myself that an eddy is not stagnant water.  When we find ourselves there we're not really doing nothing.

Looking for a photo of an eddy, I found this description on a site about kayaking:

An eddy is part of a river where there is no water flow (or in some cases there is a tiny whirlpool where the water spins in a circle). They are generally set off to the side and created by a small creek flowing into the main river in the opposite direction or there could be a blockage that forces the main flow of the water in a different direction – like a massive rock or downed tree.

A river eddy can be a lifesaver for a paddler. They offer a place to rest, relax and scout the perfect line ahead. When you’re in an eddy you shouldn’t have to paddle at all, or at least, very little because there is no water flow.

What a great reminder of the purpose of this energy I am in!

I felt this energy in August too. 

There is a profound sense of some kind of groundwork being underway.  Things being set in order, arranged.  I myself often feeling I'm stretching and warming up for re-entry into the flow of things, and sense the river will have expanded when I do so.  That what I'll enter will be the current of aliveness which flows from the leading edge of me, informed, accelerated and expanded by this time of seemingly doing very little.  It also feels like things I see and vision in my life will unfold with ease...and yet right now, there is often big-time-quiet in my inner landscape...and if I'm not appreciative of what's taking place, I can slip out of relaxation and ease and into self-judgment, feel irritated or impatient.

Oh that desire to be DOING is so strong when one is in a human body! :)

I am so appreciative of being shown again, how much I can blunder into a perspective where I measure and evaluate ME with a sense of how much I am doing.  I am grateful to release even more of this and embrace myself and my life with unconditional appreciation. 

Then I find leisure and joyous effortlessness open up even more fully.  After all, when we envision paradise, doesn't it certainly include lots of free time, a relaxing pace and the ability to flow as we like?

I love that life is teaching me the ways of the new earth. 

I have to let go and let a new vision continually expand and arise to realize what life in paradise might actually be like.  I think there is a reason sometimes people win the lottery and then don't know what to do with themselves.  Getting all that freedom requires us to enlarge our sense of what's possible and to really listen to what will give us joy!

To let go of doing and working toward this all the time--which we're SO steeped in--and shift to allowing ourselves to receive the gift of expanding freedom which we're creating and allow ourselves and our life to change.

In my life I see more and more the invitation to give myself MORE FUN.  To allow play and seemingly "un-productive" aspects of life to expand.  To see once more the straightforwardness of claiming my own divinity, and being gifted with abundant time and space as a pathway to bliss.

One of the things you don't know until it's yours, is HOW all this time and space, and ease will feel to you.  After the initial awe wore off, I find myself surprised at how often I realize I am not sure what I want or what would be the most fun.  I am being invited to continually up the ante in terms of clarifying and learning what gives me joy, and choosing that moment to moment for myself.  I am also realizing that to remove all limits to my sense of what's possible is a progressive process.  I gradually discover ways I scale down on my largest vision of joy and remove those limits.  Cultivating a new expectation which knows I can create anything I desire.  

I am also being invited to deepen my trust in the moments of not-doing, in the moments of stillness, and to lean back into the energy of life allowing my patterns of being to be as dynamic as they need to be to harmonize with the flow within me.  Some months I channel and write and teach a lot.  Some months I am very quiet in this way.  I am learning that I'm always able to continue to live well and that there is always what I need day to day, moment to moment--regardless of my activity level.  My level of experience is not dependent on my activity--it's created by my expectations.  This is fun and invogorating, as well as for me takes some practice.  As my basic wonderful needs get met with reliability...a doorway of possibility opens and I find myself sometimes a bit bored, and wondering, "What my dear Meredith one, would have you soaring and open you to even greater aliveness and self-expression?"  It pulls me out of old patterns and can be answered with the simplest of things--like lying in the front yard enjoying the sunshine--to remembering how much I liked water skiing and contemplating do I want to create this in my life once more?  This endless eternal powerful creator stuff of life, calls forth a fullness of dynamic experience of permission, creativity and stillness in ways that I am still learning to spread out into, to takefull advantage of.

It's interesting to deepen my abilities to create in collaboration with Gaia.  To feel the patterns and cycles of our planet and water--the pervasive and common element of our experience--and take clues from them as to what is also going on within me and allow myself to do so.  To know that all of life is ONE and that wherever I find myself is really deeply perfect.  To know this in a practical way--like in terms of how much money I make this month--not to separate this from my life.  Like my spiritual life is one thing and my practical wordly life is another.  They are one and the same.

The more deeply I allow myself to lean into this, the more spacious life becomes.  Then the more my old paradigm distrust of this surfaces for release and I find myself being even more awed and delighted by the newness of life that is MOST obviously being created.

Water, clearly is reshaping things.  It's the avenue that Gaia can use to alter landmasses.  In collaboration with the lunar sentience to create rhythms and cycles that are our life pulse.  With intention and choice we can replicate energy forms, or qualities of energy in water.  (As Masuro Emoto reminds us.)

This weekend I was speaking to a friend who lives in the Pacific Northwest, and she shared with me the way the abundant water there affects her--how she often feels as though she IS the water and flowing, moving, peaceful.  And yet--she finds it hard to tap into motivation to do things. 

Later in the weekend, I remembered my own hindsight observation after living in Seattle in the mid 80's.  I recalled the sense I had that had I stayed there I would have been happy, but I would likely have never accomplished anything.

What IS this about water that had this effect on me, and perhaps my friend? Or more accurately, why was I so concerned about this?  Isn't happiness the point?  Apparently for me then, it wasn't--I had gotten my priorities out of order a bit.  I cared more about doing certain things then being happy.  I think this happens more then we may realize.

Nancy shares in her post that water is rearranging us, inside and out.  I agree.  I can see now, that it is teaching us to un-learn all of the old paradigm ways of effort.  I am being guided to let go of that internal alarm which goes off and my inner voice that says, "hello there--you're not really being very productive lately."  I am getting used to just smiling at this and instead of worrying I re-assure myself that I create using my focus.  I do something fun and let the current to carry me into a convergence with my life and to trust and enjoy the spinning and languid lull of those times when I'm seemingly out of the main stream.  Recognizing the gift of these times, rather then resisting them with impatience and self-criticism.

Years ago, I was hiking in the Canadian Rockies and one day visited Johnston's Canyon in Banff.  Rushing water carves through limestone, creating amazing landforms in the relentless powerful way, only water can. 

We were walking through the canyon reading the trail signs and laughing at the repetition.  The signs kept saying, "water carving rock, rock carving water."  Over and over again throughout the trail was this refrain, "water carving rock, rock carving water."  Whoever wrote this was wise and humble.  Wise to realize it's this persistent humble quality of water which is able to cut through rock, and humble to tell the story like it is and trust us to notice the truth in the repetition, not read it as a limited ability to narrate our hike.

I see that I missed this a bit before.   Water actually IS a huge part of the life force within ME.  Relentlessly eternal.  Love filled and persistent.  Clearing, clearing, clearing.  Making way.  Opening.  This water flowing through the Bow River Valley, formed this canyon over thousands of years.  It's actually even called a "creek."  A pretty soft term for something that altered the landscape and rock, so significantly.  I am not nearly so hard as rock, imagine the effect it might have on me, especially if I yield and go with the flow.

Water is closely related to Turtle energy; slow and steady.  Turtles in Native American teaching are the oldest symbols for the planet Earth.  Turtle perspective reminds us to flow harmoniously with our situation, to not push things and to allow things to ripen.  That is the message I was reminded of by Nancy's post today.

The Turtle buries its eggs in the sand and allows the sun to hatch them.  It reminds us of the allies we have in the Sun and the Earth, and the water.

I am thankful for my confusion this morning about what was happening within me.  I love that I seek understanding when I am confused, and am appreciative of discovering more to release of the old paradigm that associates doing with happy outcomes. 

I know happiness is a fundamental.  It's not dependent on anything.  It, like love, just IS.  It's everywhere and available always.  And as resting is not doing nothing.  Things are not always what they seem.  More and more I see beyond the old paradigm collective beliefs and past the veil of the illusion, is a slowly materializing memory of paradise, and an evolving vision of my own new, modern paradise.  Life at the Ideafrontier!  Expect wonderful.

 

nourishing your power

 
by meredith murphy

I have been merging with nature consciously since I was a small child.  I didn't think of it as anything unusual.  I will say though, I was well aware that the experience definitely had a certain charge!  A kind of magial, secret power...I knew there was something awesome about these moments in life and being a person aware of living this way even as a child I knew this. I also knew it was something to do by myself and often.

I used to go and sit outside on the front porch during a rain or even thunderstorm.  There was a little notch at the corner of the house created where the huge picture window frame jutted out and the surrounding brick was set back at the corner.  Just the right size for someone small enough to sit and not be seen from either direction.  I loved to sit there and become one with everything.  I love that I grew up in a household where I had lots of freedom to explore the outdoors and be.  No one interrupted me or worried about where I was.  I felt confident, connected, elated and entirely safe.  As I dissolved in my secret space, I would feel an incredible bliss arise.  I felt huge and spacious.  Elated and expansive.  I felt like ME. 

When I lived in Nashville I used to walk often at Radnor Lake.  As you walk around the lake the bushes are tangled and dense and when I could find an opening I would step off the trail and sit within the thicket.  As I relaxed and was still, without any effort on my part, I would feel the boundaries of my energy dissolve. I could then sense tiny movements and all kinds of life energy around me that I could not see or hear.  Lots of small birds which live darting in and out of these thorny bushes at amazing speed begin to come out in the open as though I was not there.  Playing!  People would walk by and not even notice me.  Meanwhile, I was getting a giant juiced up infusion of exhilarating life-force energy.  My awareness was non-local and I was part of the whole.  This mode of being I now know fed my energy body, (what I now know is my KA body) and again, an incredible bliss arose. From the release of all resistance and all identity?  I don't know.  But whatever it is, it works.

It's powerfully expanding to take your awareness, and thus your state of being, to different levels of focus on purpose.  To realize that you exist as YOU reading this simply by focus, and that you can alter that, anytime you want.

One of the ways I learned to channel consciously was to attune myself to the energy of another thing, and eventually, another focus and speak what I experienced.  

More and more I have returned to the simpler way of being that I engaged in as a child.  I just expand without words, and feel.

Today, I was very inspired by this image...this beautiful bird (finch?)  So delicate and free. 

I began to soften my own energy to attune to this gorgeous landscape...to imagine the feel of resting on a zinnia, wings tucked back, entirely supported.  At ease.

Openness takes me once more into spacious expansion, and bliss.  And with this openness is freedom--no obstructions to flow.  My vitality, an endless spring.

Then I began to see...and make connections.

For a long time I didn't make any correlation between these nearly daily experiences and my own enormous personal power.

I have always had an unusual amount of self-confidence and trust in my own power.  For much of my life, I didn't even know this was unusual.  Only as I got older did I gradually discover that not everyone felt this way.  I typically am so involved in my interests, what I'm learning, my passionate self-expression and being with friends and animals having conversation and fun, that I don't compare myself, I just AM.  As I began to work as a executive coach and strategic consultant, a career coach, leading teams and teaching, I realized my experience was more unusual than I had known.

The way any of you know me now, is in many ways, pretty much how I've always been.  I know what I feel and think.  I learn things quickly.  I'm quick and smart.  Clear and bold.  Energetic and positive. Creative and logical.  Soft and outgoing.  Love being alone and open and accessible to connect with.  Confident and enthusiastic.  Engaged and involved.  I make money easily, change my life as frequently as I like to keep up with me.  I find myself good to great at most things I turn my attention to.  I don't feel I need to prove myself to others and I don't care too much about what others think about me.  I don't feel I need a degree or a resume to open doors for me.  I've gotten all kinds of jobs and created work because it was what interested me and my energy and confidence made things happen.  I'm robust physically, coordinated and strong.  Loved and loving.  Connected and free.  I'm continually thriving, and moving toward greater thriving.  I trust life to speak to me.  I trust my presence, I trust the Universe and I believe in the innate capacity of YOU in much the same way.

Audacious?  Well, yes--by old paradigm criteria.  But isn't this somewhat the way self-love and empowerment feels like?  

For a long time I didn't make any correlation between these nearly daily experiences of non-local knowing and energizing, and this atypical human experience of enormous personal power.  In hindsight I see the energizing of my etheric body and this regular return to the fullness of non-local perspective, is the literal fountain of youth; sustaining my innocence, curiosity, flexibility, sense of self and ultimately, my feelings of being powerfully capable, deeply loved, vitally important and totally free throughout my life.

Amazing how simple it might just be to find your power, and to expand it.

It might not actually require you to participate in rituals, find a guru, commune with ascended masters, go back to school, spend thousand of dollars on therapy, or learn secret techniques.

I'm not knocking any of these approaches and I myself spent lots of money on therapy reclaiming aspects of my childhood.  Obviously I channel ascended masters and love the experience.  So these things work and are very helpful, but I am urging you to tap into something even deeper.

I noticed that even during the most difficult parts of my own years of therapy, I felt my own resilience, in a much stronger way then it seems others I know have been able to.  After an especially hard session, instead of feeling tired and sad, I used to ride my bike home from my therapist's office, roaring out loud at the top of my lungs about what I was going to be and do, while weaving amidst downtown Chicago traffic and feeling invincible. 

Why is that? 

I feel it has to do with these direct experiences with the true nature of reality that reveal our inherent God-ness and the bliss, that if you don't know how to find it, feels SO very elusive and if you do know it, sets you free--it grounds you in a fundamental state of worthiness and awesomeness that's kinda bullet-proof, actually.

Isn't all of adult life about going after the paths and things, experiences and relationships which will return us to a state of happiness we KNOW is fundamentally what life is all about?  Aren't we working towards that peaceful, blissed out state, seeking some kind of return in so many ways?

I keep thinking lately that life is really a path of returning to wholeness because in wholeness we feel powerful.  HUGELY POWERFUL.  And we're innately powerful.  It's natural.  When we're young and haven't forgotten this yet, we live differently...we're not worried about getting hurt.  We go and do what seems fun.  If we get knocked down, we mend and do it again.  We follow our heart.  We are open and innocent enough to feel life in so much richness it's glorious and mind-blowing on I-can't-wait-to-get-out-of-bed-and-ride-my-bike kind of daily basis.

I believe we can plug directly into all this just by returning to a non-local presence regularly. 

I now continue to create these experiences, only with a much fuller understanding of what is taking place.  I use solar flares, channeling and high-vibe energy of all kinds to nourish my energy.  I do this by becoming non-local, or one with everything, and this happens just naturally as I relax and allow.  I can also do it intentionally with my focus.

Looking back upon my early experiences with this shows me how natural this all is.  I was never afraid when I became one with the sky, the rain, with all of nature, when I extended my energy out to merge with the entire Omni-verse.  I just felt bliss. INCREDIBLE bliss.  You know--the way we feel after great sex, kinda bliss.  Think about it...

When you're in love and you have just had great mutually orgasmic sex, there is an intimate secret bliss between you and your lover.  A radiance that lasts and an energy field you're within (the non-local one you co-created and shared, btw).  You look at one another in knowing wonder and glee at what you've shared and felt.  There is deep satisfaction, fulfillment and peace.  You actually feel profoundly powerful, if you think about it.  And filled with love.

That's what I feel whenever I release my local identity of Meredith, and allow it to enlarge into an expanded non-local field of whatever I choose to be the boundaries.  I feel a huge sacred private connection that exhilarates me and alters everything that follows it.  I feel spacious, huge, gladdened, made more alive and inviolable.

I might expand into a connection with all of the planet, or just the rain, I might become one with a place I'm in, or enjoy an expanded and merged state of being with my pets or dissolve into the whole sky.  There may be forms within this field, but my awareness rests in the space within the forms and the space outside the forms; the non-local fluid omnipresent Oneness.

And in this openness, I feel, simply, like me.  The ultimate, infinite, splendiferous, cool, powerfully creative, loved, me.  The me that lives life, as Byron Katie, says, (reflecting total empowerment, nonchalance and trust), "Everybody already LOVES me, they just don't know it yet!"